Sometimes I lay in bed wondering
“What the hell was I thinking?”
Again, trapped in the same quick sand
of my love for you that sinks me in so deep.
You wouldn’t know that I’m struggling to
keep myself above the surface,
trying to breath what little air I have,
as you lie there peacefully in a sleep.
I watch you so often the structure of your
face is sketched in my mind, the baby-like
slumber that disguises everything about you
and for once it’s as if you’re meek.
And although I silently lay, inside of me
screams, in hopes that you will hear me,
awaken you from your dreams, then
maybe you’ll know my love for you is making me weak
The door that could free me, still remains closed
and it’s not that I’m unable to open it, but it’s you
that stands between, unable to love me, yet unable
to let me go. Selfish, you are but in love with you I am,
unable to speak.